Perfectly good? what is the definition of perfectly good? i guess that also depends on what your definition of bad is....ive been known to be called bad for many reasons in the past and im sure i will be called it many times in the future. Who really knows us in life? u can be sure so many people are judging us....but how do you define yourself? hmmmm well thats a tough one....how do i define myself? i dont take bullshit, but i occasionally have to give some...its the nature of the beast..you mess with the bull you get the horns...i like that phrase because its epically defining of my nature....your either friend or foe...there is no inbetween really...at least not to me. ive been called hard...one or twice....or fifty thousand times....and hard is apparently a bad thing...but a lot of being 'hard' comes from experience...life experience...so maybe it isnt a good thing...but having said that...i dont really care...i guess part in parcel of being hard...you have to be prepared in life to make the hard decisions stand up for that which u dont agree in fall fucking hard but be willing and able to pick your shit back up again afterwards...that takes a strong person...im a strong person...i have to say such a disposition isnt always for the best. i cant say i have a lot of friends...well hardly any real friends haha but i know how to pretect myself and the people i care about in whatever way possible....life is always my way of the fucking highway...which im told is not a good constitution to hold...but so be it...if you dont like me...your always free to fuck off or plank yourself onto the pointy end of a stick
byyyyyyy the way...planking is not for winners im afraid to say...its just another loser revolution of trying to do something fun that is basically fucked in the ass...seriosuly planking? someone one couldnt come up with anything better?? hmmmm......epic fucking fail im afraid!!!!
anyway moving on....i was thinking about the birth of sierra the other day.....it occurs to me that the hospital staff who were in delivery at various points must have thought i was a dark pessimistic bitch even tho i had a good altho slightly pissed off disposition due to there incompetence...anyway i have a large self done by black ink a needle and hand a tattoo and it says.... trust no one, test everything and under that..it says judge not and under that it says....love's the funeral of hearts.... pessimistic and negative much? surely so...but better to be informed than have your heart trampled time and time again... but i cant imagine what they must have though....im a myseterious leave things to the imagination type so i dont wear short skirts and the like...i prefur to be covered to some extent...so normally no one accept me see's that tattoo...its the first time anyone other than me or the kids has seen it!.... i get a lot of people asking me all the time if i plan to be getting more tattoos...the simple answer to that would be yes...i am planning to get more. i love my tattoos but of course they dont define me...but they are apart of me just like my peircings...some people get peircings and take them out regularly or take it out ot get a new one..not me if i get a peircing its here to stay permanently..the only one i seem to keep losing is the eyebrow and that because my body slowely rejects it....booo because eyebrow feels really uncomfy to get done!!!! i can be impulsive but at the same time i follow through on my decisions :) i hope my kids will be a little bit like that...but i hope they think some things through more than i did hahah
speaking of kids...there was something on the radio this morning about the octamumma and her 15 kids..and how she hates them and wishes she didnt have them anymore because its all to hard..and they had people ring in saying honestly if there were times they didnt want there kids or regretted having hem and how taboo that was...so i started thinking about it..have i ever regretted having my kids? and the answer is no...sometimes i regret that im unable to control them as well as id like and i often regret who there father is but ive never regretted having any of them especially little miss who has no dad....i always try to live my life with no regrets...bad decisions dont nessisarily mean u have to regret them as long as you learn something!.....but still its sad when people regret having there kids...but at the end of the day sometimes life gives u lemons.....lemonade...all that jazz....
anyway phyched to get my new tattoo in about three weeks im hoping.....my left lower arm will be complete and i plan to get my half sleeve fixed up and finnished off over the next few months...after all i have to be a bridesmaid next year...and ill make one hell of a rocking bridesmaid ;) tattoos, peircings and all...i did give my brother gf the opportunity to change her mind about having me...after all...photos are forever..but she said this is me its who i am and the tattoos and peircings dont bother her at all...nawww what a sweetie. she will make a great sister in law ftw.....
anyway enough with the random ranting for now....
caio bella..
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